OK, so this is one of the more ridiculous consequences of my decision to write up every show that I watch.
Jersey Shore Family Vacation reunites the Jersey Shore cast five years later for a vacation at a beach house in Miami. The only missing member of the cast that finished off the predecessor series is Sammi "Sweetheart", who apparently wanted nothing to do with this cash grab. It's alright though, because in one of the very first gags of the series, Pauly D unveils a talking mannequin to fill in as Sammi, complete with catch phrases. They actually get pretty good mileage out of that one.
Everyone's a good deal older this time around and generally nowhere near as crazy as they used to be. Everyone in the cast save for Pauly is in a relationship, Pauly, Snooki, and Jenni all have at least one kid, and Ronnie has a kid on the way. That greatly limits the spectrum of antics that the gang can get into, and on multiple occasions they have to confess questionable (at best) behavior to their significant others.
Much of what they do is contrived and obviously scripted / set up by the show's producers. They're closed off from the general public at pretty much every bar or club that the gang goes to, and the background is just littered with people filming them or shooting pictures with their phones. Pauly "pranks" the house by inviting Angelina back, in a move very clearly set up by producer Sallyann Salsano & co. In another episode, Vinny's mom and uncle are "concerned that Vinny isn't answering the phone" (the crew happened to be in the Bahamas or whatever) and fly down to Miami to "check on him". I don't know why they even bothered to invent that reason -- why else would the crew be filming Vinny's mom and uncle at their home if it wasn't pre-arranged that they were going?
Mike "The Situation" is in a bit of legal trouble for tax evasion and will face a possible/likely prison sentence this upcoming September. He's a completely different person from his original stint on Jersey Shore, as he's completely sober (in the worst environment to test that commitment), generally doesn't make trouble for people, and eats enough to kill a horse. His pending engagement to his long-time girlfriend is one of the show's running storylines. Vinny's even more subdued than before, Ronnie's still a somewhat off-putting idiot that makes bad decisions, and the girls are basically shells of their former selves from a partying perspective. Pauly's the only one that's consistently likable. I honestly wonder what they do and talk about all day in that house, because it seems like most of them just sit around, bored to tears most of the time.
All of that being said, it's light and entertaining enough to watch for fans of the series. It's certainly no worse than the last season of Jersey Shore, which aired while Snooki was pregnant and Mike had already gone sober. There's a second season of this coming out soon because MTV is aware that it doesn't put out any other programming that people care about, and we'll definitely be watching. There's basically no reality TV in my rotation (it's this and Top Chef) because it's mostly garbage, and Jersey Shore Family Vacation is no exception. But these seven goofballs find a way to make it delightful garbage.
Season Grade C+
